I have always been a huge fan of comic book heroes and villains since the day I was born. While in my mother’s womb, I think I might have made a telepathic connection with these amazing fictional characters which bound me to them for life. Since I picked up my 1st Superman comic in 1986 I instantly became a superhero junkie (much more a Superman junkie if you ask me). But my love for the heroic character took a turn for the worse when I purchased issue #75 in 1992, which was titled “The Death of Superman!”. I thought it was a joke but alas, my main man was defeated by a scumbag called Doomsday. The pain and agony was with me for months! The death of Superman was my “comic book kryptonite”; it defeated the interest I had in the comic book world to a large extent. I mean, if Superman couldn’t make it, then no-one could.
The first time I felt this instant connection with something non human since that dreadful incident in 1992, was when I was introduced to the wonderful world of SEO. I instantly became obsessed with the subject, and up until today, I strive to learn more and more about this magical industry. Unlike Superman, SEO will never be defeated and thus I am assured that I am not investing my time and energy into something that will simply suffer the same fate as Superman did, under the hands of that monster, Doomsday.
I could not think of a better comparative blog post than taking my two obsessions and determining which superhero / villain would fit the criteria of being “top notch SEO” and take the coveted “Super SEO” Title.
I thus asked myself this question: If awesome SEO were comic book heroes or villains, who would be the ultimate fit? I will 1st look at three classic superheroes which I think will not be able to take the title due to their central flaws, flaws which will not “fly” in the SEO realm. I will match up different SEO elements with their flaws and discuss why they are not the chosen one:
I highly doubt that anyone would have thought that this would be my first unsuccessful consideration. Although he does seem like the obvious choice as he packs a multitude of powers ranging from super strength, super speed, flight and much more, I simply cannot get over the fact that he can be rendered harmless by swinging a little rock called kryptonite at him. Don’t get me wrong, I still think he is awesome, but if I think of this in SEO terms, something very small can knock your site back tremendously. Broken links, spammy links, duplicate content, missing Meta tags etc are all small things that are avoidable, but once you come into contact with them, no matter how powerful your site is, it can and most probably will stun organic progress. Due to his kryptonite weakness, Superman aka Clark Kent, in my opinion is therefore not the best choice for this title.
On top of this main flaw, there is also his love interest Lois Lane, which constantly took his attention off the game (which was to save the world I might add!), and in SEO you must always have your eye on the ball. Taking on Google is nearly as intense as saving the world so sorry Kal-El – this one is not for you.
Useless fact about Superman – Every episode of Seinfeld either had a picture or action figure of Superman displayed in one of the shots.
Spider-Man possesses spider like abilities such as super strength and can also stick to surfaces. He is also extremely agile and has amazing reflexes. Don’t forget about his “spider sense,” that warns him of upcoming danger. Wow, this should surely be the winner of the SEO title! Someone that can warn you of impeding Search Engine penalties? Amazing! But no. Not even that can substitute for his main flaw; his sense of responsibility.
Few people realise it but before Peter Parker’s well known love interest Mary Jane, he had another love interest; Gwen Stacy. She was Peter’s 1st love interest and was killed during an epic battle between Spider-Man and The Green Goblin. It is this reason that he became utterly confused about his role and responsibilities as a modern day superhero (some might remember the rather recent Spider-Man two and three movies where this was very evident). Unfortunately, with SEO you cannot be uncertain about what you are doing.
You cannot be uncertain about your keyword choice, your strategies or simply stop doing it because you don’t feel like it. You need to develop strategies around the keywords you thoroughly researched, so be sure they are the correct ones and stick to implementing the strategies. (To avoid this “web of destruction” where your strategies do not work, rather consult trusted SEO experts who will know exactly what to do). This major flaw in this formidable superhero will unfortunately prevent him from taking this title. Remember Peter – “with great power there must also come great responsibility” – something which you always seem to question.
Useless fact about Spider-Man – The publishers didn’t want to do a character named Spider-Man at first as they thought it was too scary.
A brilliant scientist, Bruce Banner (as he was formerly known) was caught in an accidental blast of gamma radiation. He is now cursed to transform, in times of stress and anger, into the being of destruction known as THE INCREDIBLE HULK. Now The Hulk can cause some serious damage with his immense power, but does become out of control and irrational as his stress levels increase. He is also extremely impatient. Although a “brilliant scientist” does indicate that he would be a perfect fit for the very technical realm of SEO, unfortunately SEO is hard work and at times can become stressful.
Whether you are a SEO agency, conduct your own in-house SEO or employ a company to handle your organic matters, patience really is a virtue and you always need to keep your head. Having someone like Bruce Banner on your team could cause an entire project to collapse, as he’ll end up making irrational decisions, such as buying a 1000 directory links, when he is stressed due to obtaining insufficient rankings. As a client, be patient with your agency as rankings do not happen overnight. SEO is not easy at all, it is very hard work and irrational decisions will make your job even more difficult or sour your relationship unnecessarily with your SEO agency (therefore let your agency set clear goals at the beginning of the campaign which you agree on). Sorry Hulk, first take a chill pill then maybe you can take this title.
Useless fact about The Incredible Hulk – In the early editions of The Hulk, he was actually grey instead of green.
I had no doubt in my mind regarding who the winner would be on this challenge. Although a villain, Juggernaut’s anger and feud with the X-men was solely driven by his abusive father. He is also not the sharpest tool in the shed, but it is mainly due to his ability that makes him a perfect match for this title. Cain Marko, as he is known, was granted superhuman strength and invulnerability after finding the mystic Gem of Cytorrak. The only flaw that Juggernaut has in my opinion is that he is rather powerless as compared to the likes of Thor and Superman etc when not in motion. He gains extraordinary power when h
e gains momentum and is capable of shattering mountains. He is described as being physically unstoppable once he gained sufficient momentum and does not tire physically. I think that if Juggernaut could run in a straight line continuously without any obstacles, he would become the most powerful superhero of all time.
Now I cannot find a better way to describe SEO than this. Unfortunately, your competitors out there are doing some hardcore SEO and if you do not (i.e. simply remain “SEO motionless”) they will defeat you! There is no “let’s play nice” in SEO, competitors (your villains) will take you down without thinking twice. If you employ SEO strategies for a continuous amount of time without any breaks, your site will gain momentum and ultimately become extremely powerful.
If Juggernaut stops his momentum he will be knocked down, and the same goes for SEO. A huge misconception that people have is they think they can do SEO for only a short period of time and when they have the rankings, simply stop doing it. The reality is that your villains out there will not stop. They will not tire until they have defeated all their foes! They will blast links, ooze out content, and warp new strategies into being which will leave you beaten and bruised. Don’t sit back and become a victim.
Juggernaut, your ability and major flaw is what SEO should and shouldn’t be. A perfect fit – Well done!
Useless fact about Juggernaut – There is no useless fact, he is simply awesome!
Be on the look out for Issue #2 of “The Adventures of SuperSEO!” due for release next month.
